Q. How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? A. WHEREAS the Party of the First Part, also known as "Lawyer" and the Party of the Second Part, also known as "Light Bulb," do hereby and forthwith agree to a transaction wherein the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) shall be removed from the current position as a result of failure to perform previously agreed upon duties, i.e. the lighting, elucidation, and otherwise illumination of the area ranging from the front (north) door, through the entryway, terminating at an area just inside the primary living area, demarcated by the beginning of the carpet, any spillover illumination being at the option of the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) and not required by the aforementioned Agreement between the Parties. The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but shall not be limited to, the following: 1. The Party of the First Part (Lawyer) shall, with or without elevation at his option, by means of a chair, stepstool, ladder, or any other means of elevation, grasp the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) and rotate the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) in a counter-clockwise direction, this point being non-negotiable. 2. Upon reaching a point where the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) becomes separated from the Party of the Third Part ("Receptacle"), the Party of the First Part (Lawyer) shall have the option of disposing of the Party of the Second Part (Light Bulb) in a manner consistent with all applicable state, local, and Federal statutes. 3. Once separation and disposal shall have been achieved, the Party of the First Part (Lawyer) shall have the option of beginning installation of the Party of the Fourth Part ("New Light Bulb"). This installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in paragraph 1 hereof, except that the rotation shall occur in a clockwise direction, this point also being non-negotiable. NOTE: The above-described steps may be performed, at the option of the Party of the First Part (Lawyer), by any or all persons authorized by him, the object being to produce the most possible revenue for the Party of the Fifth Part ("Law Firm").